A lesson from something I enjoy a great deal, baking Pie.
Often I can be pretty hard on myself, we all can. I constantly am thinking of what I DON'T achieve in a day, which makes me feel like a failure, only to wake up and start it all again. How can goodness be found in dwelling on negative things? It cannot. We work too long, don't give our children or spouses the attention they crave; daily going through the motions, saddened by time just passing us by; only getting glimpses of freedom and leisure life. There are many things we can find negative about ourselves, but contentment and grace are necessary. Do we have regrets? Do we strive for better? What can we do to improve? How can I be truly happy? Can I be comfy in my own skin? Can I find joy in the small things? I think we are capable, we just have to cut ourselves some slack.
I'm going to attempt to think differently. My husband told me last night that I should give myself as much grace as I would the lard, flour, salt, sugar, and water of one of my most beautiful creations. And finding peace and patience, trusting that the end result may not be what was originally envisioned, but ultimately it will be eaten, appreciated, and savored. We are human and imperfect.
As a baker, of some pretty sexy and award winning pastries, I have been thinking about the endorphins that kick in, just figuring out the pie I wish to make. It makes me smile and it also makes me think of my Grandma Shirley, every time I decide to create one. I think of her face and how proud she was when I was much younger to see me following in her tiny footsteps with my huge clodhoppers. :) I also think of my Grandma G, and how one Saturday morning at the Senior Center, on 1 regular olive green oven, she, my sister and I, whipped out 14 pies for a local bake sale. What gives you that drive? What is your passion? It is in that, where you'll find that solace to make it through another day.
I've screwed up a lot of pie crusts in my day. A LOT. I've doubled half of it, forgotten salt, is that a lady bug? ...oh so many things. One time I made an absolutely beautiful pie, worked on it for hours, only to have the wind knock a salt shaker right in the middle of the thing. I was devastated. But you know what? The whole thing was eaten. I know this is a simple thing, but sometimes we need a reminder of the beauty in our lives, despite the imperfections.
Is there not enough dough for the bottom? trim and add and work with what you have.
Did the edge slump in or out onto the bottom of the oven during baking? Quite possibly, but that just means you get to enjoy it sooner, fresh outta' the oven, or get a little extra yummy crust in your slice.
The raspberry gel is making my smoke alarms go off all around my house because its oozed out and onto the oven floor. Learn from mistakes and take with you the wisdom to remember the tin foil lined pan on the bottom of the oven the next time...and granted, it might still smoke, but at least the clean up will be easier.
You may be a hot, hot mess, covered in flour from head to toe, hair tossed up in a messy bun, prints on your glasses, sweatpants with hand prints of flour all over your behind because you are flying around the kitchen like a formula 1 driver. Don't forget the joy in the whirlwind fury. You might even have a bit of fun. You might even crack a smile and laugh. You're a wild child that needs to exist this way, so embrace your beautiful, messy self.
I've actually said before after completely destroying a pastry..."It's just pie" and at almost 38 years old, I'm finally learning to apply that to my life.
